Drew Curtis' FARK.com

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Fri June 07, 2024
	A family may have made history after all four daughters were named valedictorian - a feat that's reportedly a 1 in an 11 billion chance. Home schooled? source: foxnews.com \| share: Copy Link	17
	The dark side of Taco Bell? source: dailymail.co.uk \| share: Copy Link	17
	Airman's stare leads to deadly shooting by Florida deputy. Who knew eye contact was this dangerous? source: atlantablackstar.com \| share: Copy Link	29
	The Merriam-Webster word of the day for June 7 is gossip, as in "Drew has to stop every few minutes to gossip some bourbon" source: merriam-webster.com \| share: Copy Link	5
	Time to stock up on some herbal tea, I suppose source: dailyboulder.com \| share: Copy Link	65
	Photoshop this flower girl source: usatoday.com \| share: Copy Link	13
	Manatee County restaurant refuses to serve alligator source: wfla.com \| share: Copy Link	18
	Farkers, your worst fear has been realized source: katu.com \| share: Copy Link	33
	Think twice before taking pictures of yourself in drag having sex with your wife. They may end up in a museum in 100 years. Unless that's the part that turns you on, of course source: theguardian.com \| share: Copy Link	46
	Day 835 of WW3: Kremlin attempts to invoke historical memories of Cuban missile crisis by announcing Havana naval visit. This after Putin warned he could supply weapons to other nations to strike Western countries. It's your Friday Ukraine war thread source: news.sky.com \| share: Copy Link	94
	'My family survived the Titanic - here's my message to billionaires diving to see wreck'. FOOK OFF source: msn.com \| share: Copy Link	44
	"We have normalised horror" source: theguardian.com \| share: Copy Link	64
	A dog has reached hero status after it ran four miles to alert its owner's family of trouble when the man lost control of his truck and crashed into a stream. With a knick-knack, paddy whack, give a dog a bone, his old man came rolling home source: msn.com \| share: Copy Link	14
	A drunk Russian soldier killed 7 of his comrades when he threw a grenade into their barracks. Nyet, comrade source: themoscowtimes.com \| share: Copy Link	48
	The State of Colorado settles for $8.5 million with a woman who was left handcuffed in a police car, on the train tracks source: cnn.com \| share: Copy Link	31
	If you're in the market for a professional-quality studio and a warehouse full of dubious brain pills, I know just the guy source: cnn.com \| share: Copy Link	58
	There is no FDA. There is only Juul source: nbcnews.com \| share: Copy Link	35
	A bird on the head is worth two on George Bush, or something like that source: huffpost.com \| share: Copy Link	17
	Goldilocks and the Killer Bear source: yahoo.com \| share: Copy Link	27
	Garfield High on lockdown after shooting. Odie, Jon, and Nermal now packing heat source: kiro7.com \| share: Copy Link	21
	Be a sweetie and wipe the seatie if you're using a public bike for the World Naked Bike Ride. Not rubbing your nekkid arse all over a public seat also an option source: toronto.citynews.ca \| share: Copy Link	23

Thu June 06, 2024
	Australian man preplexed by why 500 tyres showed up in his driveway, why it is spelled with a Y source: au.news.yahoo.com \| share: Copy Link	34
	"Brilliant" Florida woman figures out how to steal a car legally source: wfla.com \| share: Copy Link	17
	They say that Mark doin burnouts is not too bright on Broadway source: fox17.com \| share: Copy Link	8
	There were also record snowfalls, record colds and an arctic blast. So it all evens out in the end source: msn.com \| share: Copy Link	12
	World War Two veterans who used a 'Ghost Army' of inflatable tanks to trick the Nazis are finally honored source: metro.co.uk \| share: Copy Link	15
	I think I saw this movie source: popsci.com \| share: Copy Link	47
	NeedrebA, Aberdeen, tseitterp town ev'I ever nees source: baltimoresun.com \| share: Copy Link	8
	4th grade Show and Tell with a Glock source: ktla.com \| share: Copy Link	32
(CBS 2 Iowa)	There has GOT to be a better way to publicize your movie treatment source: cbs2iowa.com \| share: Copy Link	19
	IHOP patron gets rooty, tooty, fresh & abusey with syrup bottle source: local10.com \| share: Copy Link	26
	Today's Out-Of-Control Ship Headed For Bridge story comes to you at 14-17 knots from Charleston, SC source: counton2.com \| share: Copy Link	24
	Photoshop these environmental engineers source: qu.edu \| share: Copy Link	18
	Pro Tip: If you're a police precinct staging a fake school shooting, you may want to give the students a heads-up first source: vtdigger.org \| share: Copy Link	36
	Predator Hunters land catch of the day, non drag variety, news at 11 source: nypost.com \| share: Copy Link	42
	Attempts to recreate the deadly playgrounds of yesteryear remain unappreciated source: bbc.co.uk \| share: Copy Link	80
	Experts say other people are having less sex, point out that you aren't because you can't go negative on that source: aol.com \| share: Copy Link	64
	Shakespeare in Delaware Park Opening Night Reception. Buffalo, New York. June 20th, 5:30PM source: fark.com \| share: Copy Link	7
	Kilt-wearing Texan admits putting store items up his butt. In his defense, he did return the soiled merch to store shelves source: thesmokinggun.com \| share: Copy Link	38
	Martha's Vineyard resident re-enacts D-Day beach landing with his boat source: wfsb.com \| share: Copy Link	21
	UK Health Security Agency: "We have an urgent health warning about an E.Coli outbreak linked to a nationally distributed food item". UK public: "What's the food item?" UK Health Security Agency: "Wouldn't it be more fun to guess?" source: news.sky.com \| share: Copy Link	44
	Southern Baptist Convention's He-Man Woman-Haters committee files motion to expel all congregations with pastors who are also women... unless they're classified as "called ministers" source: dallasnews.com \| share: Copy Link	70
	Well, we probably can't mine it for precious metals. Can we break up the heat dome with nuclear warheads? source: npr.org \| share: Copy Link	38
	Photoshop this angelic oak source: media.cntraveler.com \| share: Copy Link	18
	Old and busted: porch pirates. New hotness: title pirates. Yarrr, shiver me encumbrances, matey source: fox7austin.com \| share: Copy Link	23
	4PM Eastern - It's the Fark News Livestream with Drew, Dill and maybe Christine. Make Dill Read Awkward Headlines edition source: twitch.tv \| share: Copy Link	8
	Usually only happens in the movies or on Gilligan's Island source: centralmaine.com \| share: Copy Link	57
	Woman's life "turns into horror movie" after finding prop skeleton in hidden room. Wow, that horror movie would suck source: mirror.co.uk \| share: Copy Link	29
	Is that a five foot python under your sink or are you just happy to see me? source: nbcnewyork.com \| share: Copy Link	14
	But what are they going to do with their semen now? source: theguardian.com \| share: Copy Link	44

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