Fishing Jokes: | |
 | |
| |
| |
| |
| |
| |
| |
Visit our sister sites | |
The Best Fishing Jokes on the Internet ! | ||||||
Showing 21-30 of 69 fishing jokes ranked by jokes rating | ||||||
21. | I think the only reason my husband likes to go ... | Jokes Rating: |
| |||
I think the only reason my husband likes to go fishing so much is that it's the only time he hears someone tell him, "Wow, that's a big one!" | ||||||
Anonymous | 19th Dec 2002 | JokesID: 33 |  | |||
22. | Heard the one about the three blondes that went .. | Jokes Rating: |
| |||
Heard the one about the three blondes that went ice fishing and didn't catch anything? By the time they cut a hole big enough for the boat to fit in it was time to go home. | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 36 | | |||
23. | An Irish priest loved to fly fish..... | Jokes Rating: |
| |||
An Irish priest loved to fly fish, it was an obsession of his. So far this year the weather had been so bad that he hadn't had a chance to get his beloved wadders on and his favourite flies out of their box Strangly though, every Sunday the weather had been good, but of course Sunday is the day he has to go to work. The weather forcast was good again for the coming Sunday so he called a fellow priest claiming to have lost his voice and be in bed with the flu. He asked him to take over his sermon. The fly fishing priest drove fifty miles to a river near the coast so that no one would recognise him. An angel up in Heaven was keeping watch and saw what the priest was doing. He told God who agreed that he would do something about it. With the first cast of his line a huge fish mouth gulped down the fly. For over an hour the priest ran up and down the river bank fighting the fish. At the end when he finally landed the monster size fish it turned out to be a world record Salmon. Confused the angel asked God, "Why did you let him catch that huge fish? I thought you were going to teach him a lesson." God replied "I did. Who do you think he's going to tell?" | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 40 | | |||
24. | I am NEVER going to take my wife fishing with me, | Jokes Rating: |
| |||
Two guys are talking about fishing. One says to the other, "I am NEVER going to take my wife fishing with me, ever again!" "That bad, huh" "She did everything wrong! She did everything wrong! She talked too much, made the boat rock constantly, tried to stand up in the boat, baited the hook wrong, used the wrong lures and WORST of all she caught more fish than me!" | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 41 | | |||
25. | A small town Doctor was famous in the area for ... | Jokes Rating: |
| |||
A small town Doctor was famous in the area for always catching large fish. One day while he was on one of his frequent fishing trips he got a call that a woman at a neighboring farm was giving birth. He rushed to her aid and delivered a healthy baby boy. The farmer had nothing to weigh the baby with so the Doctor used his fishing scales. The baby weighed 22 lbs 10 oz.. | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 43 | | |||
26. | A woman goes into a shop to buy a rod and reel as | Jokes Rating: |
| |||
A woman goes into a shop to buy a rod and reel as a gift She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter where there's a shop assistant wearing dark shades. "Excuse me sir" she says "can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?" The assistant replies "Ma'am I'm blind but if you drop it on the counter I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes." She didn't believe him, but dropped it on the counter anyway. He said, "That's a 6' graphite rod with a Zebco 202 reel and 10 lb. test line...It's a good all around rod and reel and it's only $20.00". The lady said, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I think it's what I'm looking for so I'll take it." He walks behind the counter to the register, and in the meantime the woman breaks wind big-time. At first she is embarrassed but then realizes that there is no way he could tell it was her...being blind he wouldn't know that she was the only person around. The assistant rings up the sale and says, "That will be $25.50." She says, "But didn't you say it was $20.00?" "Yes ma'am, the rod and reel is $20.00, but the duck call is $3.00, and the catfish stink bait is $2.50." | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 49 | | |||
27. | The manager of a small business and his secretary | Jokes Rating: |
| |||
The manager of a small business and his secretary decided to go over to her place for some "gymnastics". Afterwards, they both fall asleep When the manager wakes up and looks at his watch, he discovers that it is after 8 o'clock in the evening. He jumps up in a panic wondering what he's going to say to his wife. He tells the secretary to quickly take his shoes out into the yard and rub them around in the grass. Then he finishes dressing and goes home. When the man opens the door to the house, his wife is standing in the doorway fuming and asks him where the hell he's been until 8:30 in the evening? The man calmly replies that he and his secretary are having an affair and that they had fallen asleep after going to her place this afternoon. His wife looked at him very carefully and when she saw the state of his shoes, she exclaimed: "You liar, you've been FISHING!" | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 54 | | |||
28. | A man was surf fishing along the beach when he ... | Jokes Rating: |
| |||
A man was surf fishing along the beach when he found a bottle. He looked around but didn't see anyone so he opened it A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out. The genie said, "I am so grateful to get out of that bottle that I will grant you any wish, but I can only grant one." The man thought for a while and finally said, "I have always wanted to go to Hawaii and fish along the beautiful beaches of Hawaii. I've never been able to go because I cannot fly. Airplanes are much too frightening for me. On a boat, I see all that water and I become very claustrophobic. So I wish for a road to be built from here to Hawaii." The genie thought for a few minutes and finally said, "No, I don't think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved. Consider all the piling needed to hold up a highway and how deep they would have to go to reach the bottom of the ocean. Imagine all the pavement needed. No, that really is just too much to ask." The man thought for a few minutes and then told the genie, "There is one other thing I have always wanted. I would like to be able to understand women. What makes them laugh and cry, why are they temperamental, why are they so difficult to get along with, when they want attention, when they don't. Basically, what makes them tick." The genie thought for a while and said, "So, do you want two lanes or four?" | ||||||
Anonymous | 29th Jan 2003 | JokesID: 55 | | |||
29. | Slow Down! | Jokes Rating: |
| |||
A cop pulls a guy over for speeding and the guy's defence was, "I was just going with the flow of traffic." The Cop's response... "Ever go fishing?" "Yeah...." "Ever catch ALL the fish?" | ||||||
Joe | 2nd Nov 2003 | JokesID: 66 | | |||
30. | Liar, liar | Jokes Rating: |
| |||
A young man and an old man were fishing on a pier.The young man started telling the old one that the night before he caught a trout that was over 3 1/2 foot long. The old man replied "Oh yea, well I was here 2 nights ago and I hooked something huge. After a 30 minute fight I finaly got it up and it was an old lantern and the thing was still lit." The young man said "Your lying. I can't believe that." Then the old man said "I'll tell you what, you knock a couple of foot off your trout and I'll blow out my lantern." | ||||||
Shark | 7th Nov 2003 | JokesID: 68 | | |||
Page 3 of 7 | ||||||
| | | | | | |
Copyright @ 2002 - 2013 Best Fishing Jokes.com
All rights Reserved